Over the last week, I’ve had a wonderful time with War-N on a small vacation. We didn’t go anywhere as you would on a “typical” vacation. Instead, we stayed home doing the things we love to do. War-N worked on music nearly every day while I split my time between gardening, giving my thoughts on the music work War-N had done (which was EXCELLENT!), a tiny bit of writing work and some other rather non-creative things like laundry and some fun cooking and such. We even cooked dinner together. Awesome!! It was lovely just being able to be together during a normal week but surrounding ourselves with whatever we wanted to do. No plans. No expectations. Just creative loveliness. I do get spoiled by having him all to myself. I’m glad to have that luxury whenever it presents itself!

So, one of the things we did was an impromptu photo shoot. I was the subject and War-N the photog. He shot many, many photos, but I found this one said a lot to me when I kept going back to it as a favorite. I don’t usually even like photos of myself, but I think there’s something to be said about the person who can see inside you the most getting a good picture of you. War-N does seem to capture a certain something about me that no one else can. I think that speaks volumes. Plus, I actually like it!

Cb Shadows

The only adjustments I did (in Aperture 2, of course!!) was that I brought the red channel down and boosted the luminance of the red channel to even out the skin tone. The original was a bit orange, so lowering the red helped. I brought the mid-tone shadow levels down a bit to make richer blacks and I think the adjustments gave it more of a “glowing” mood without adding my usual “diffuse glow” to smooth out the skin. I didn’t want too much glow. Just the suggestion. I love that you can still see my dark hair against the dark wall, but the mood is still very much a shadowed picture. Great job, War-N!!

One secret that I’ve used the last few years is parchment paper on a plain old aluminum hood clip-on lamp (like the ones you use on fish tanks and such). The parchment paper (unbleached) really softens the light, and the paper is meant to withstand high heat, so it’s a perfect match. Cheap and cheerful! To that lamp, I add a dimmer and used two lamps on either side of the body. One on the lower body, one on the face. It’s a bit tricky for exposure at times, finding the right angles and light strength, but enough play will get what you want. I keep the ISO low so as not to get too much noise in such a dark setting. Even with my beloved Nikon D300, I still get the ever-annoying noise in some situations with a high ISO. Blargh!! So, this was just on 250. Also, a tripod is always a good suggestion when using low light. War-N managed to hand-hold this one, but you can still see a slight blur in the eyes. Luckily, it actually adds a certain something to this shot. A few more from this series may come to light, as it were, because there are still quite a few I liked. We both had a ball just hanging out, drinking chocolate martini’s, listening to Goldfrapp and taking photos. It was a grand end to a wonderful vacation. We were together. We were home.

In all my years of taking photos, and being in them, I just find I get the results I want when the mood is darker. I like the mystery. I like the shadows. I like that it brings out beauty that usually stays hidden, or it hides things that are unflattering and brings forth the true beauty of the subject. We aren’t all models, and we shouldn’t be. We need to find our true beauty, accept it and embrace it. Find the best angle. Find the best light. There are so many extraordinary pictures still waiting to be taken. We should all just go for it!

As we get back into the mode of War-N working and me being here, doing what I do, we come to terms with the fact that it has to be that way… for now. No matter what life throws at us, we have each other. When things get dark, we meet in the shadows and find the light together. Sometimes, all we need is a tiny glow to find our way back home.

Find your darkness. Find your light.

Much Love,

cb

Over the last few weeks, War-N, his brother David and I have been rehearsing for a musical performance for their parent’s 40th wedding anniversary party. Along with that, I have been making plans to make their anniversary cake. The party is over now, and all went off without a hitch. The music of Studio II (David and War-N’s band from the 80′s) was absolutely wonderful and we also performed a handful of songs as Hungry Lucy. It was much fun despite the nerves associated with playing to a room full of people that you actually know! It’s much different to play to family than strangers. I prefer the latter. But, it went very well. We all had fun and the cake was adored beyond my wildest expectations. I was even asked to do a wedding cake, but I kindly said no. I’m not that skilled just yet!

The cake plan definitely took a lot more out of me than the music does. I’m used to planning for shows. But, the cake. Well, that was much different. It all started when I offered to make it back in late 2008 when Peter and Carol first started talking about it. The plan went through many changes and looked as if it wasn’t even happening a couple of times. But, it did indeed happen, and I think they both had a loverly time.

So, I did a “cake trial” back in January and the decision was so easy for them. I made two options. One was a chocolate butter cake with a raspberry white chocolate buttercream icing. Carol loves the combination of raspberry and chocolate, so I was attempting to find a good marriage, if you will, of those two flavors. It didn’t quite work, and it was ugly! The taste was great, but something about it said “little girl’s birthday cake” and it just put me off to look at it. Then, the second option was one I just thought of as I browsed through my cake cookbooks and magazines. I wanted something classic, but rich and elegant at the same time. A “Yin and Yang” kind of thing. I know how well yellow butter cake and chocolate icing went together, so I just came up with a version of that. The end result was the classic yellow butter cake with a chocolate-sour cream icing. Then, on top of that, was a medium chocolate ganache coating. It sounds as if there would be way too much chocolate, but believe me. It worked a treat! I did such a thin layer of the chocolate-sour cream icing that the total of the icing and ganache was the perfect thickness to accompany the cake. P&C loved it, so that was the main concern. The extra compliments from guests were truly, and literally, the icing on the cake!

What was interesting was that when the four of us (Peter, Carol, War-N and myself) did the cake trial, we all agreed unanimously that the yellow and chocolate was the clear winner. I totally thought we’d go through a few trials to get the perfect combo. But, no. And, we’re all chocolate lovers, so the choice for yellow cake was a bit of a surprise for all of us! That said, I think the chocolate butter cake is still fabulous. Just not with the raspberry concoction I put it with.

I know I must be a true foodie because I was so incredibly turned on by the texture of this yellow butter cake batter! It looked, and felt, like yellow velvet. So smooth and so luxurious when I poured it into the pans. Oh my! It’s because of the “butter cake method” that the texture was so different. I know have that under my belt no problem after making a total of 7 individual cakes! It’s just that one extra step in the beginning that makes all the difference in the world in the texture of the cake. Instead of a creaming method with the butter and sugar first and then adding the eggs and vanilla etc., you treat the flour, salt, baking soda/powder as the sugar and cream the softened butter with that first with a bit of the liquid (in this case, it was milk). You actually beat it on medium speed for about a minute before adding the remainder of the egg yolks, milk and vanilla. Usually, you don’t want to over beat a cake mixture or you develop too much of the gluten in the flour. But, since you’re using a cake flour here, there’s not as much gluten in soft wheat anyway. SO, this actually helps develop texture. Bizarre, ay? Big thanks to my kitchen book of choice when baking cakes, “The Cake Bible” by Rose Levy Beranbaum. It is truly a book to treasure and learn from! No matter what baking query I search for, there’s always a solution in this book. Even with all of my other “professional teaching books”, I learn more from the lovely Rose than anyone else.

So, weeks went by with no activity, as the party was planned so much in advance. I had the design in my head and tried to relax about it until I needed to get started. Then, the party was a couple of weeks away. I went out and got my new large cake pans, an awesome heavy duty cooling rack and all the things I needed for this massive cake. Then, it was the week of the party. I began shopping for my ingredients three days before the party. I can’t tell you how many times I went back for yet more chocolate! I melted over ten pounds, and used about seven total! Butter was a huge ingredient, too. Many pounds of that were used. Despite all of that melting and working with the chocolate, I still want more! Isn’t it beautiful?

The baking begins.

I started baking cakes on Thursday, then again on Friday. By the end of Friday I had everything assembled and crumb-coated and then the cakes were all safe and sound in the fridge (after we re-organized everything to clear off the shelves!). This was the first time I had done a cake with simple syrup on each layer. It really does help to keep a large cake moist! And the crumb coat made the ganache really stick to the outside of the cake. I still need a lot of practice with smoothing it out, but all in all, I was quite pleased with how it turned out. I chose not to do piping, as I’m not that great at it yet. I coated the cakes in the ganache Saturday and then added the final touches to the cake later on Saturday at the location. I decorated the cake with these tiny little chocolate drops (by Leone Torino, an impossible link to find in working order!) and candied violet petals. The combination of purple and chocolate brown were quite lovely together. It looked so sinful all assembled and sitting pretty. It sat high and mighty on a white marble slab, as it was the only thing big enough to hold it! The lower level was 12 by 12 inches. No cake plate I had would do the job. I needed a marble slab anyway, so that was a bonus for me It was admired briefly before being cut into pieces and devoured by the guests. I did a pretty good job cutting it, too. I surprised myself! The main trick is not to go too big with the pieces.

I loved how the candied violet petals sparkled in the dim light. The flash made the finish on the cake look rather strange, but that’s the price you pay with semi-shiny chocolate and a straight-on flash! My bounce flash was dead. Silly me.

The party came and went, but part of the cake is still present at Peter & Carol’s! They had a whole lower level left, plus a bit of the second tier. I don’t think they were complaining that they had extra cake.

I learned a lot from this experience. I learned I could totally get into doing this as a career choice, if I had a staff and a place to do it. I learned that over-estimation is bound to happen and you will have left-over cake (but better too much than not enough, right?). I learned that things always take longer than expected and, thanks to War-N, I stayed on schedule!! And, I learned that nothing is perfect. It doesn’t have to be. It is going to be eaten after all!

As a musical performer as well, I had a ball playing with War-N, and David (we did a cover of Cyndi Lauper’s “Time After Time” as all three of us, and it were lovely!!). I didn’t use my in-ear monitors, and it felt so much nicer. I was nervous, but I let it feed me rather than bring me down. It was a wonderful night, even when my feet were on fire with pain! I didn’t sit down until near the end of the party. What was I thinking??

We as Hungry Lucy performed 5 songs on our own. It was nice to perform even a tiny set like this for friends and family. It was just enough to make me want to play more! Obviously, Peter and Carol took this shot (not sure which??).

With all the ganache I made, extra for safety, I had a ton left and decided to make truffles on a day-to-day basis. It went well with extra remnants of the plain, pretty cake dusted with a cinnamon/cocoa concoction. With a cup of tea, of course. No complaints here!

Now, I move on to my gardening project, finishing my book, finishing the Hungry Lucy album and a few other projects in between. 2009 is an ambitious year. I’m up for the challenge!!

This was my favorite shot that I took. Its of War-N, of course, and I just love how he looks so damned happy playing music. Suitably donned in his “Hacker” shirt. Oh, my beautiful boy. You sure do know who you are!

Now, if only I had a slice of cake…

Much love and peace,

Christa Belle